Love of My Life

Love is a bitch. It shows up when you are not looking for it and leave when you least expects it to. That’s what love will do to you if you walk around with your eyes closed. It will smack the hell out of you and fuck up your life if you are not careful. If I had someone that I could trust to share my feelings with, I would have avoided all this pain.

Sometimes I lay in bed and cry gut wrenching, deep painful slobs. I cried all during the day, in the evening and throughout the night because I wanted something that I could not have. Therapists and counselors alike always say communicate your needs, talk to your husband and let him know straight up what you need in your life to be fulfilled. I did that but you know what happened. Nothing! Absolutely nothing!

I can still remember the time that I tried to do just that. “Honey,” I said, “Can we please talk? I need more from you”.
“I can’t talk right now. I’m busy", he said.
“This is important,” I said.
“So is what I’m doing”.

I walked away feeling as if the world had caved in. You know how that feels like my heart jumped out of chest, climbed up to the Rocky Mountain and jumped straight down into the pits of a fiery hell. At least that is how I felt until I met a man who made women panties leak with their own body’s juices while lusting after his fine ass.

It never occurred to me that I, Jessica Williamson would desire the love of another man or want him to stick his penis in my most prized possession, my pussy. But that’s what I wanted and I needed it badly.